Late Night with Jimmy Fallon
Colorado will become the first state to lower the minimum wage. They plan to lower it from $7.28 to $7.25. As a compromise, workers will be able to leave work nine seconds earlier.
Happy Birthday to Angela Lansbury. She turned 84 today. She celebrated at a party until one of her friends was murdered.
The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson
A Republican senator from Maine voted with the Democrats on healthcare. What!?! This is the first time a Republican has switched sides and not been arrested in an airport bathroom
Late Show with David Letterman
Yesterday, Bernie Madoff got into a fight in prison. He’s really screwed, now.
Bernie and another inmate fought over the stock market. Isn’t that how all prison fights start, when you think about it?
Madoff got into a fight in prison. So they’ve got him on a diet of bread and water . . . like his investors
The Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien
The Nobel Committee is saying the reason they gave Obama the Peace Prize is for reducing tension around the world. So, the runners-up for this year’s Nobel Prize were “red wine” and ”the Brookstone 3-Speed Massaging Recliner.
Yesterday in New Orleans, a little boy asked President Obama, “Why do people hate you?” Then the little boy turned to Joe Biden and said, “I know why people hate you
The Jay Leno Show
President Obama won another Nobel Prize today. This time in medicine for pretending to give up smoking.
Of course, Republicans still can’t believe that Barack Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize. But then Democrats can’t believe that Sarah Palin wrote a book.
The governor of California’s wife, Maria Shriver, was photographed violating the law by talking on her cell phone while she was driving. I read about it on my BlackBerry while riding into work on my motorcycle.
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